Quit your job

Three months ago, I started working at Omniture.

When I tell people that I work there, they always ask me they same question.

“I’ve seen all those green billboards,” they say, “but what do you people do exactly?”

When they say that last bit, the “do exactly” part, they raise one eyebrow, squint their eyes a little bit, and really peer at me. Like they’re looking for Waldo.

“We do online business optimization for large corporations.”

“Right,” they say “but what do you do?”

“We help companies get the most out of their marketing efforts by providing them a suite of online applications covering web analytics, search engine marketing, A/B testing, behavioral targeting, and advanced customer segmentation.” I say.

“Uh huh. Sure. But what do you DO?”

“We eat catered meals, watch TV, play Guitar Hero, pool, and Wii Tennis, hold lavish company parties twice a year, and organize office foosball tournaments.”

“Swear a cuss!” they yell, “I knew it!”

“Yeah,” I say, “Sorry.”

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