My Thoughts in the Early Morning

This morning I woke up at 5am. After attempting to get comfortable enough to fall asleep, my mind decided to stay awake and think about my children. Even now, an hour later at 6am, as I sit here at the computer, I can’t help but cry when I think about how much I love my girls. Sure, they get in trouble and aren’t necessarily angels, but what would be the fun in raising children that were already good? I certainly wouldn’t learn any of the lessons I’m supposed to learn. It seems as though patience is the #1 lesson I need to learn in this life, at least during this time of my life.

I went into their room just a few minutes ago, tucked them into their beds, and just stared at them. As I looked at them and brushed the hair out of their faces, I couldn’t hold back my tears. They have blessed my life more than I could ever tell them. I love them more than I could ever express to them. They make me laugh every day. They also make me frustrated pretty much every day (this is where a good heap of patience on my part would really come in handy).

I am trying to be a better mom. And I really need to be a better mom because these precious little spirits deserve (at least) that from me.

With my long list of things to do before the baby comes, I need to remember to make time for my girls and put that at the top of my list. When Gwen brings me the book Corduroy so that I can read it to her for the hundredth time this week, I need to stop what I’m doing and read it to her. And then when she asks for another book, I need to keep reading to her. I need to sit down with Inez and draw with her (her newest passion). I need to listen to what she tells me and have real conversations with her. I need to hold them and snuggle them as much as they will let me because soon enough there will be a different baby occupying my arms.

And while I’m really excited for that to be the new reality, I can’t let the last few days of this reality slip away without relishing them to the fullest.

  1. Beth

    Oh there you go, getting me all teary-eyed again. Thanks for that. You are a great mom. And, I’d like Gwen’s boots in a size 8 1/2 please. Thanks.


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